Bacon, Gasoline and Football.....

I doubt any of the things in the title will be mentioned, but as I've learned from the music today, the title doesn't have to have any correlation to the content. In fact; I could just write up a bunch of lines that have no business being together, as long as they rhyme. Music was so much better back when each song told a story. But I digress....

As strange and unlikely as it may sound, I was actually subjected to a moment of deep thought and contemplation while watching an episode of "Futurama." I know, deep thought and a show that may actually lower your IQ should never be related in any way, but somehow they were....

Synopsis: Two humanoids are on a planet populated by robots that hate humans, and they are dressed up as robots to avoid detection. They come upon a checkpoint where two giant robots ask them this test question: "Which of the following would you most prefer: A- A puppy, B- A pretty flower from your sweetie, or C- A large properly formatted data file?"

Sadly enough, the only thing that sounded interesting to me was C. Pets cost money and cause headaches. I'm a heterosexual dude, so the flower is out of the question. But the data file might be an upgrade to one of my video games, or maybe, just maybe the one upgrade that makes Vista worth fighting with. Wait, they said properly formatted, so that rules out the Vista thingy.

Then my twitchy mentality started thinking about how having a sweetie would be awesome, no matter what gifts she might give me. *TWITCH*... Puppies are cute as hell, especially when they are just learning to walk and falling over all the time....

Wait, where was I going with this? Oh yeah, I've recently figured out that I'm this weird hybrid of a computer junkie crossed with a blue-collar manly man. I enjoy tech-ish stuff like Flat-screen HD TVs, Surround Sound, Fast 'Unholy Internet' access, Video Games.... And manly stuff such as: sitting around the campfire, shooting stuff, blowing stuff up, welding, telling dirty jokes, laughing at farts and putting my feet on the furniture. Yet for some reason I'm still single.

Actually, now that I think about it, that pretty much sums up why I'm not tied down.

Somewhere in this world, there has to be a gal who laughs at farts. And I'll find her.

I'm done. Goodnight/Good day/ Go Away.

-B-

“I just broke up with someone and the last thing she said to me was "You'll never find anyone like me again!" I'm thinking, "I should hope not! If I don't want you, why would I want someone like you."” -- Unknown