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Cynicism, sarcasm, and Political Incorrectness are my specialty. Or specialties. Whatever, just shut up and read....

Tuesday, May 3, 2011

Fun at The Mailbox.....

Just had some fun picking up my mail, here's a transcription/screenplay of the highlights...

(Me walking to mailboxes, a shout comes from a patio) Douchebag: "What up retard?"

Me: "Huh?"

DB: "Yeah you, who let you out at night?"

Me: "I suppose you are trying to communicate with me, you uneducated piece of shit."

DB: "huh?"

Me: "Exactly what I expected. Now,I don't expect anything resembling a logical answer, but what made you think I had mental difficulties?"

DB: "Cause you're f%$#in retarded, you were walkin like a penguin and swaying back and forth. Even retards know a few big words. Keep denying it."

Me: "I walk funny because I have bad knees and a bad back. Things associated with working for a living and developing self-worth. You obviously associate your self worth by how many chicks you can nail in a night. Oh, and by the way, the girl you have your arm around... she has three kids. They aren't here this weekend, daddy has them. And they are loud and noisy as hell. She also has an ex that shows up from time to time and requires a police roll out to get him to leave. Did she tell you any of that? Did you just jump at her thinking "Wow, you're pretty..." Yeah, I walk funny and check my mail at night. You screw your life up by poor decisions and think muscles make a man."

DB: Fuck you.

Me: "Hahahahah, I'm going to read my mail now, have a good night."
----------------

I have learned to dislike calling people retards. Or saying someone is retarded. Retarded means slowed down or behind. Like retarding the timing on a car. But it has become an insult, a joking term, something that is stupid and such. I have several friends and family members with sisters, brothers, cousins or kids that have mental or physical disabilties that would tend to have them considered "retarded." But they aren't. Their brain may not function like ours, but it is working as fast as it can. It's not slowed down or handicapped. "Retard" has become an insult like the N word. So we need to quit using it. Just about everyone has a relative or a friend who has mental or physical deficiencies. So by insulting anyone, you are insulting everyone. Just say Stupid instead.

I'm done.

-B-